Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week


43. Gay Test (Big Mouth, S01E03)


Honourable Mention

  • Salman Rushdie (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S09E03)
  • Jimmy's awkward hook-up with Adrienne (You're the Worst, S04E08)
  • Penises playing basketball (Big Mouth, S01E01)
  • ♫: "Everybody Bleeds" (Big Mouth, S01E02)

Stray Observations

  • "I've got a monkey holding a banana like a phone."
    "Who's he calling? [laughs] Oh, it's fun to imagine, right? Michael Jackson." (Bob's Burgers, S08E02)
  • "I had a very productive day yesterday."
    "It's true. It was like Cocoon." (Bob's Burgers, S08E02)
  • "Florida is for people who don't know about Hawaii." (Ghosted, S01E03)
  • "Mitch Bachelor." (Ghosted, S01E03)
  • "I don't like when my clothes billow." (Ghosted, S01E03)
  • "Oh, you guys feeling like rock-and-rollers? Yeah, Coldplay in the house!" (Ghosted, S01E03)


(Ghosted, S01E03)

  • A-Rod playing Flip Cup with the Gronks (Shark Tank, S09E04)
  • ♫: James Carr – "These Ain't Raindrops" (The Deuce, S01E06)
  • "What is your problem? We had something. I felt it. I felt it on the bow, I felt it on the stern, then a few more times on the bow, then the stern again. Then you flipped me over onto my starboard side. I even tried aft for the first time." (The Last Man on Earth, S04E03)
  • "Take your unsucked candy and get back to your desk." (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S09E03)
  • "Oh, you can't 'yoo-hoo' a judge?"
    "You most certainly cannot 'yoo-hoo' a judge." (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S09E03)
  • "For we are not donkeys. Or in Brooklyn, we would say 'dunkeys,' for some reason." (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S09E03)
  • "Fuck you, Elvid!" (Curb Your Enthusiasm, S09E03)
  • "Were you just spying on us? Drinking my RC Cola!" (Vice Principals, S02E05)


(Vice Principals, S02E05)

  • "Let's go out back by the dumpsters. I have a huge hole in my panties." (Vice Principals, S02E05)
  • "Don't do it inside my Silverado." (Vice Principals, S02E05)


(WWE Raw, 10-16-17)

  • "He's sensitive. Classic Leno fan." (Fresh Off the Boat, S04E03)
  • "You can send back baby corn. You can't send back baby." (Fresh Off the Boat, S04E03)
  • Ray Wise doing karaoke (Fresh Off the Boat, S04E03)
  • "Sorry I'm late, guys."
    "What's your excuse today? Uh, another OJ verdict?" (Black-ish, S04E03)
  • "Guess how old fine Angela Bassett is?"
    "Wow! She's 59!"
    "What?! Tina Turner is 77!"
    "Whoa. Crispus Attucks is 294." (Black-ish, S04E03)
  • "This is bad. This is worse than white people with dreadlocks." (The Mayor, S01E03)
  • "We got this tradition where you gotta choose each other's Halloween costume, and whatever gets chosen, you gotta go with it."
    "You gotta commit."
    "Oh, okay, do me."
    "Fernando Valenzuela."
    "Who the hell is that?"
    "Who the hell are you? He's only, like, one of the best pitchers of all time."
    "I've never heard of him."
    "People will love it, trust me. My turn."
    "Randy Johnson."
    "You guys making these names up?"
    "Don't do pitcher just 'cause I did pitcher."
    "No, I'm not. You inspired me. You know, I mean, you got these…floppy limbs and this, like, emaciated face. [pause] No, like, in a good way. [pause] I find Randy Johnson very attractive."
    "All right, whatever. Alba, do Jimmy."
    "Okay, uhh… Garbage."
    "Garbage what? Like the garbage man to drive a truck?"
    "No. No man, no truck. Just…garbage." (The Mick, S02E04)
  • "Dude, I'm just trying to get a drink."
    "All right, well, sit tight, guy. My homegirl's filling up her pumpkin." (The Mick, S02E04)
  • "Who the hell are you?"
    "I'm Randy Johnson." (The Mick, S02E04)
  • "None of you stand a chance against me. No courage, no patience, no brains, and, of course, a bald old man."
    "I'm younger than you."
    "No comeback for the bald thing, I see." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S05E04)
  • "Hook, line, and sphincter."
    "It's 'sinker.'"
    "No, it's 'sphincter.' That's where you put the hook in when you're eeling." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S05E04)
  • "Wait a minute. This isn't the championship cummerbund. This is some common cummerbund. And you're not Cheddar. You're just some common bitch." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S05E04)
  • "Terry also loved the show."
    "No, no, I love Elisabeth Moss. Terry thought the show was too bleak." (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S05E04)
  • Evan Peters as Andy Warhol (American Horror Story, S07E07)
  • "Holy shit. I just got a retweet from Eric Trump." (American Horror Story, S07E07)
  • "Silly girls are all stupid and doomed. History may change, but herstory always repeats itself." (American Horror Story, S07E07)
  • "SCUM stands for the Society for Cutting Up Men." (American Horror Story, S07E07)
  • "We were the Zodiac." (American Horror Story, S07E07)
  • "What did you even say to them anyway?"
    "That you're an enormous pain in the ass and that they shouldn't let you in."
    "Excuse me! I am a joy in the ass!" (Speechless, S02E04)
  • ♫: Characters singing "Milkshake" (Riverdale, S02E02)
  • ♫: Characters singing "Milkshake" (South Park, S21E05)
  • "Cankle Action" (You're the Worst, S04E08)
  • "Sign up for Trunk Club. Pop a few Zoloft. Join in on the live-action cartoon of 2D emotions that everyone else is in." (Mr. Robot, S03E02)
  • ♫: Barenaked Ladies – "One Week" (Mr. Robot, S03E02)
  • "Jason's a nice person, but my suitors were always of a certain…echelon. I used what I called the 'Duke Rule,' because Duke is both minimum acceptable university and rank of nobility." (The Good Place, S02E06)
  • Shrimp dispenser (The Good Place, S02E06)
  • "Diamonds are literally carbon molecules lined up in the most boring way. They're worthless space garbage. What you're holding right now, that's basically meteorite poop." (The Good Place, S02E06)
  • "Nobody try Mystery Flavor. It's white chocolate, and it is nasty." (The Good Place, S02E06)
  • "It was unfortunate that Sal's mom was still alive, because the suit was perfect." (Nathan For You, S04E04)
  • "If there's stuff from her body that she doesn't use…" (Nathan For You, S04E04)
  • Mindhunter Season Grade: C
  • "Now let's watch McConaughey bang two meth heads at a rodeo, and try not to think about AIDS. [breathes heavily] Andrew…"
    "Yeah?"
    "I'm thinking about AIDS." (Big Mouth, S01E01)
  • "Jai ho!" (Big Mouth, S01E01)
  • "Oh, look, the lost and found became a person." (Big Mouth, S01E03)
  • "Lacrosse tryouts are tomorrow. Exciting news for rich sociopaths with a loose concept of consent." (Big Mouth, S01E03)
  • "Ghost cock is like vegan bacon – it just isn't as good as the real thing." (Big Mouth, S01E03)
  • "Everything in the gay community is a thing." (Big Mouth, S01E03)


(Big Mouth, S01E03)

Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: The Deuce
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: Nathan For You

#clipoftheweek

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