B: Hey, I'm bringing over some leftovers from Sophie's birthday party.

Jon: Jeesh. How much pizza did you order? And how big was her birthday cake? This leftover cake could pass for a whole birthday cake.

Jon: Who puts zucchini on a combination pizza?

Jon: Oh! Peach birthday cake…

[mobile rings]

I wonder who's calling. No one ever calls me. 404?

Jon: Hello?
Catherine: Jon, it's aunt Catherine. I'm in the area for a doctor's appointment, and I'm gonna drop off some saba.

My uncle-in-law Yoshi is a sushi chef. Years ago, I made the mistake of telling him that saba is my favourite sushi fish. Since then, he won't stop curing and pickling mackerel for me.

Catherine: This box is nigiri, and this box is sashimi.
Jon: Jeesh. Save some for the whales.

I don't have the heart to tell Yoshi-san to STOP WITH THE FUCKIN' MACKEREL.

I also can't, as I don't speak Japanese.

B: Hello?
Jon: Hey, do you have any Pepto-Bismol?

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