Weekend Nachos

"Conscience off, dick on, and everything's gonna be alright."
– Mr. Han


Entertainment Weekly: Who would have thought The Karate Kid would be the summer box office savior?

Who thought it wouldn't be?

Jaden Smith + Jackie Chan + kung fu + Justin Bieber + negligible profanity + no sex = black people + children + Asians + boys + girls + families + middle America — none of whom particularly care about cinematic merit or originality. It's a post-quadrant film.

Also: Jackie Chan bare-hands fire!

RE: Xiao Dre's white apartment complex mate

I wonder if his scenes were cut for time or if his character is just a non-starter. He oddly and unceremoniously becomes an intermittent extra.

Justin Bieber – "Never Say Never (feat. Jaden Smith)" is eligible for a "best original song" Oscar. Would the Academy nominate (if not honour) him for television ratings?

I dug the use of Gorillaz – "Dirty Harry" (Schtung Chinese New Year Remix)."

Methinks Chinese Johnny Lawrence has a future in a youth-starved martial arts film industry.

Whoa. Chinese John Kreese was the Iron Monkey!

RE: South Africans and vuvuzelas

You have to admire their tenacity.

If a soccer game is tied after 85 minutes, the field should begin shrinking a la Bomberman. We have the technology.

Reviewing 'The Karate Kid' Remake with My Hardass Asian Mom
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