It's time I got back to the good life

—what do you think about comments?
—well
—i leave them on for my own site since no one reads my site
—but for your site, it's up to you. your traffic is unknown to me but you tend to attract fuckwits


The local paper published its Best of Silicon Valley 2008.

For Best place to go with a girl posse, readers chose Santana Row.

For Best place to meet men, readers chose Santana Row. Explains the best place to go with a girl posse.

For Best place to meet women, readers chose…"Winner has since closed."

Note that for Best dance club, readers also chose "Winner has since closed."


I missed this year's National Spelling Bee and thus missed Matthew Koh, an Asian speller from (!!!) West Virginia.

He exited on the word "festschrift," which he spelled "festrifd."

[pause]

That's not even a good guess! What word ends in "fd"?

Stick to maths, boy.


If the Spelling Bee ever runs over and needs to eliminate a bunch of spellers quickly, I suggest ambushing them with Polish surnames.

"SKRIP-seck."
"Can you use it in a sentence?"
"My name is Eric Skrzypczak."


Uwe Boll's "Stoic" chronicles a 2006 incident in which three German men arrested for nonviolent offenses (played by Edward Furlong […]) rape and tortured a cellmate (Sipos) for 10 hours before helping the victim hang himself to cover up their crime.

Sipos actually ate a tube of toothpaste, though the vomit he ate from the floor was artificial.

"When the actor licks his puke off the ground, he will be seen eating it for a minute, not just a little bit," Boll said. [source]

Torture porn by Uwe Boll — head asplode.


—they gave me a cat scan and found a hole in my colon
—so they took a chunk out
—now i have an ileostomy bag

—permanently?
—no
—but maybe 6 months

—it's this clear bag that hangs from my belly
—i poop in the bag

—wait
—yeah
—it's embarrassing

—to poop out of your tummy?
—a little bit

—it comes out itself

—i have to drain the bag a couple times a day
—i'm afraid it might leak

—well, at least it's a bag and not a catheter
—oh god
—my catheter messed up
—they had to take it out and put in another one day
—only to take that one out the next

—vanmega is stupid for hating the weezer video


WWE.com added Alka-Seltzer's mascot to the SmackDown roster.

Way to target demos, Bayer.


NBC will air a special "Incredible Hulk"-themed episode of "American Gladiators" with guest star Lou Ferrigno sharing the arena with host Hulk Hogan.

Gladiators will use Hulk Hands while competing in the Gauntlet.

The arena's water will look green. Titan will be green. There will be green lighting, green graphics, green balls for Powerball. Pretty much everything will be green. [source]

Or yellow, if you're colourblind.


Titan?

Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone…

related:

The celebrities in Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Wrestling TV show that starts taping this week are Dustin Diamond, Todd Bridges, Trishelle, Nikki Ziering, Frank Stallone, Erin Murphy (Tabitha on Bewitched 40 years ago) and two others yet to be named.


The Opening Act From the Original, Unused Teleplay of Lost's Pilot Episode.
Comic-Con Tips
Hell's Most Wanted

3 Comments

  1. Tony 04 Jun 08 at 10:14

    "Stick to maths, boy."

    "Or yellow, if you're colourblind."

    Was this sudden burst of British English intentional?

    Reply
  2. eric 05 Jun 08 at 01:50

    worst Polish surname: Brzęczyszczykiewicz…
    there is a serious lack of vowels in the Polish language.

    Reply
  3. Jon 06 Jun 08 at 00:12

    "Was this sudden burst of British English intentional?"

    "Maths" – yes.
    "colourblind" – no.

    Reply

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