I chose an eternity of this

After removing a light-blue button-up shirt to reveal a t-shirt onto which he'd scrawled "KILLER" in black marker, T.J. Lane, who pleaded guilty last month to murdering three teenage boys in a school shooting, smirked as an Ohio judge gave him three life sentences without the possibility of parole.

Lane responded to the victims' grieving families with two brutal sentences: "The hand that pulls the trigger that killed your sons now masturbates to the memory. Fuck all of you." He then gave them the finger. [source]

!!!

Even Marshall Henderson's like

and he gives ZERO fucks.

Give me one acre of cellos, pitched at some distant regret

Featuring…?

Oh. The dancing 48-year-old in the Black Keys' "Lonely Boy" video.

"I'm elated, and I'm still in shock, to be honest. I've been out [in Los Angeles] for 10 years, pursuing acting and music, so hopefully this will lead to more work," he said.

10 months later:

"I just did the ESPY Awards at Staples Center, working security." [source]


Up until a couple weeks ago, Wansley had a full-time job as a Software Test Engineer. His biggest thrill as a musician in recent years was landing a role in the chorus of the Seattle Opera's production of Porgy and Bess.

A couple weeks later:

Wanz is working on his own brand, setting up a merch website, working on a new EP, and looking to find a way to profit off a series of sayings he's coined over the years, referred to collectively as "The Book of Wanz."

[pause]

Asked if he's worried about being pigeonholed by that one lyric ["this is fu-cking awe-some"], Wanz says, "I'm always gonna be the 'Thrift Shop' guy. The question for me has been, 'Am I gonna stay that guy, or am I gonna be the guy who came in as this, and then they found everything else?'"

Oh Wanny… You and I both know that you're gonna stay that guy. You are Dido to Macklemore's Eminem, Super Cat to his Sugar Ray, LV to his Coolio, the gotta keep 'em separator to his Offspring.


Idea: A bizarro episode of Saturday Night Live that's just an hour of sax solos.

Our kisses taste like alcohol, you know that means it's love

Rory: i've never heard of this frank mcklusky film
Steven: it's like ace ventura

Surely they could've found a better third film, and one from 1994 like the other two.

Wikipedia » Notable films released in 1994:

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

Airheads
Blankman
Clifford
Exit to Eden
Junior
North
Serial Mom

All fine options.


Shirty Business

Art Piece Idea: Imagine the Internet as a newspaper. Create and print a copy of that newspaper.

The front page story is spread across 22 pages.

All the columnists begin columns with "Hey guys." "Sorry I haven't written in a while…"

A "Dear Yahoo!" advice column.

Letters to the editor: "Your gay," "This has been flagged as spam."

Man-on-the-stweet answers to a hashtag. #MajorTurnOffs

A comics page composed of webcomics, rage comics, 4panes, macros.

Craigslist classifieds.

Television torrent listings.

Blank spaces/pages where ads were blocked.


Even Dave Kloc is right twice a day

Pfff!

LOL Cool J, amirite?

LL Cool JK.

Mama said "get the fuck outta here."

Authentic music from an actor on a spin-off of a spin-off.

P.F. James.

Oh gawd… The first single is titled "Ratchet."

NCIS: No Crew Is Superior (2009)
In September 2009, LL Cool J released a song about the NCIS TV series based on his experiences playing special agent Sam Hanna. [source]

#authentichiphop


I dare say that Vanilla Ice is a more authentic 45-year-old.

Van Winkle is a Juggalo and a vegetarian. [source]

Monster Blood

Hmm… Free association: Smucker's Goober PB&J.

Sosu's Thaichup is a complex ketchup that hugs your mouth in flavors of lemongrass, curry, and tomato. It's like having tom yum soup in condiment form! [source]

Okay, now that I'd buy.