The 2010 Toronto International Film Festival begins today and I am [sigh] not attending this year. I could afford a fourth trip but could not in good conscience spend the money whilst unemployed. If I [sigh] lived in Toronto, however, I would fight seven evil exes to see: The Legend of the Fist: The Return [...]

My dog died. He was delicious. Bitter Feast is a horror film about a chef who kidnaps and tortures the food blogger he blames for all his problems. [Writer/director Joe] Maggio stumbled upon the plot while reading an unfavorable Frank Bruni review in the New York Times of Gordon Ramsay's London Hotel, leading Maggio to [...]

As noted in this week's Cribsheet, Sunday marks the tenth anniversary of At the Drive-In's Relationship of Command LP, which doomed Grand Royal, the Beastie Boys' vanity record label. From the January/February 2002 issue of Blender: Trouble emerged when the label became involved in a bidding war for At the Drive-In. Grand Royal finally signed [...]

On the trailer for Devil: It seemingly preceded every film I saw at a cinema this summer. In January 2002, I named a post after the actor in the grey suit after seeing him impersonate celebrities on Undeclared. Said actor is married to Christina Hendricks. I wonder if Universal is contractually obligated to note that [...]

Whenever I see [Marilyn] Manson, he's repeating entire chunks of [Eastbound and Down] dialogue and dressed like Kenny [Powers]. He just walks around dressed like this and fucks with people on the street. If a waiter or valet tells him, "Have a nice day," he'll respond, "Don't tell me what to do." Stuff like that. [...]

34. Bachelor Pad "Who has the worst boob job?" #clipoftheweek

"Hoodie-horror" is reportedly a "uniquely British [film] sub genre brought on by the fashion choices of youth trying to avoid the gaze of CCTV security cameras." As Eden Lake and Harry Brown are classified as "hoodie-horror," I assume the horrific hoodies are hoodlums who wear hoodies and not hooded sweatshirts, but this hoodie-horror flick blurs [...]

Is Linkin Park's A Thousand Suns This Decade's Kid A? Like Kid A, it is so completely different from the band's previous efforts that it will almost certainly stand as the line of demarcation between everything that came before and everything that will come after. And, much like Kid A, there just aren't a whole [...]

What did we learn in August? 1. Degrassi's quarterback likes Hot Chip. 2. Will's supervisor does not (Rubicon). Why don't Subway or Quizno's stock Original Recipe Miss Vickie's chips? I don't want fuckin' jalapeño kettle chips, and I don't want plain Lay's – I want plain kettle chips! Why aren't they an option? I mean, [...]

"Who is the quarterback for the Falcons? I'm blanking." "He's white. He played for Boston College." "Matt? Joe?" "Goddammit! What is his name?" "I'm not football-retarded! I can name every starting quarterback in the NFC except this misterfalcon!" "Okay, I can't name the quarterback for the Buccaneers either. Whatever!" "Matt something..." It's time once again [...]

var so = new SWFObject('/flash/player.swf','mpl','500','300','10'); so.addParam('allowscriptaccess','always'); so.addParam('allowfullscreen','true'); so.addParam('flashvars','&file=/flash/th_hrd_tms_f_rj_brgr.flv'); so.write('th_hrd_tms_f_rj_brgr'); 33. The Hard Times of RJ Berger WTF was that???? He killed his best girl friend with his weiner??? AFTER she got hit by a bus??? Then he VO's, "I just did the right thing." :0 [source] #clipoftheweek • The ten greatest severed penis scenes in [...]

I see a web redemption in this band's future. Pitchfork's staff compiled a list of The Top 50 Music Videos of the 1990s. Notably absent: "Tonight, Tonight" and "Smack My Bitch Up." Two other videos I would have lobbied for: God Lives Underwater "From Your Mouth" [dir: Roman Coppola; 1998] Then Nathan's Hot Dog Eating [...]

Essential Killing Vincent Gallo plays a fugitive Taliban soldier in Europe who "must use his wits to evade his pursuers whilst battling bitter winter cold and lack of food." The Whistleblower Rachel Weisz plays a Nebraska cop on the trail of a sex-slave ring in Bosnia. Marimbas From Hell Don Alfonso loses his job playing [...]

I like all types of music, except country. I like all types of films, except ones with subtitles I like all types of television, except reality. I like all types of video games, except casual ones. I like all types of comics, except manga. I like all types of books, except non-fiction. I like all [...]

TLC's Freaky Eaters premieres on September 5. Each episode follows someone who is forced to confront the painful truth behind a food obsession and come face to face with its destructive side effects. The only two episodes announced so far are "Addicted to Cheeseburgers" and "Addicted to Sugar." I hope the cheeseburger addict isn't like [...]

Friday evening. I'm hungry. What time is it? 6:00. I can still catch happy hour at Chotchkie's. Fill up before my night of work ahead. The parking lot is packed. I hope the bar isn't too. Oh good. I seated myself in an open chair between two men and a man and a woman. "Jon [...]

32. Big Brother 12 "the single most ridiculous thing the show has ever done" #clipoftheweek

Join 311 as they cruise from Miami to Turks and Caicos with a ship full of passionate 311 fans! [source] Where does a cruise rank among gigs for faded musical artists? I say: American Idol > a cruise > an Indian casino > a corporate event > a state or county fair. What am I [...]

Derrick Rose likes to eat Skittles, so earlier this month, Wrigley delivered a Skittles vending machine to his house and promised to keep it stocked for at least three years. The machine holds every variety of Skittles and tempts him, in his own voice, whenever he walks by the machine. I picture a stoned Joakim [...]