12. Feeling Good (Legion, S01E06)
- "If you thought nougat likes lots of humidity, you'd be wrong, dead wrong." (Bob's Burgers, S07E12)
"Well, nowadays, business isn't done in offices. Business is done walking really fast down long hallways and at urinals. Haven't you seen Entourage?"
"Is it a show about people peeing and getting stuff done?"
"Yeah, more or less." (Bob's Burgers, S07E12)
- "After seeing that Peppermint Patricia wrapper…" (Making History, S01E02)
- "I don't want to have this conversation in front of the guns." (Making History, S01E02)
- "We got an airplane. If we didn't have tiny bottles, we'd be giant buttholes." (The Last Man on Earth, S03E11)
- RT: The full list of celebrities Tandy lists in his toast, pump-up speech, and eulogy: Galileo, Sir Isaac Newton, Thomas Alva Edison, Doug Henning, Pelé, Peter Frampton, Jonas Salk, Lena Dunham, Shel Silverstein, Kenny Loggins, George Washington Carver, Nelson Mandela, Jim Henson, Hamilton, the guy who did Hamilton, Neil Armstrong, Johnny Appleseed, SEAL Team Six, Ryan Lochte [before Rio]. (The Last Man on Earth, S03E11)
- Todd's somber rendition of "Fly" by Sugar Ray (The Last Man on Earth, S03E11)
(The Last Man on Earth, S03E11)
- "There's no good way to tell people you haven't seen The Wire." (Crashing, S01E04)
"How, specifically, would you handle your business?"
"I'd get mine. Set it off. Be a man. Man up. You know, represent, man. You gotta flip the switch, man. You gotta light it up."
"Sorry, a lot of these sound like lyrics from the album Willennium." (Crashing, S01E04)
- "How dare you mention Pepsi. Unlike you, it's good and pure." (Feud, S01E02)
- "Women will do what they always do when they're cornered – eat their own and pick their teeth with the bones." (Feud, S01E02)
- TONY ALMEIDA BYKE (24: Legacy, S01E07)
- ♫: Alana Yorke – "Anthem" (Bates Motel, S05E04)
- "And I read that authors should all have a strong look, so I found four authors with strong looks and I combined them. Tom Wolfe? White suit. Hunter S. Thompson? Yellow sunglasses. David Foster Wallace? Bandana. Toni Morrison? The Presidential Medal of Freedom." (New Girl, S06E19)
"Guess who has two dressers."
"I mean, you and Rip Torn."
"Stop talking about Rip Torn." (New Girl, S06E19)
- "I almost hit you with this brushed steel modern lamp." (New Girl, S06E19)
"She's your girlfriend. I'm your good friend. She should get to make you sheet cake."
"That makes sense. I just need to make something clear between us if that's okay. You're saying 'sheet' like 'ghost clothes,' not like 'in a toilet,' right?" (New Girl, S06E19)
- "The Asian Flush." (Fresh Off the Boat, S03E17)
- Jeremy Lin, Ming-Na Wen, Ali Wong (Fresh Off the Boat, S03E17)
- Bennigan's (The Americans, S05E02)
- "Campbell's Soup: 'It's just wet ass food.'" (Detroiters, S01E06)
"We've never been on the cover of a magazine…"
"Well, Chubby Buddies…"
- "Spirit Airlines: 'Dying while flying.'" (Detroiters, S01E06)
- "Bologna: 'Because it's all the meats.'" (Detroiters, S01E06)
- "Paella only has…22 ingredients?! What does it do? Summon a genie?" (Speechless, S01E18)
- "Stop singing Imagine Dragons to get me off the track." (The Magicians, S02E08)
"You think that I stole something?"
"Can you believe that, Vivian? Doesn't it just make [pulls out phone] you want to pout?" (Black-ish, S03E18)
"Okay, look, black nanny is not a thief."
"Please, black nanny, I'm defending you." (Black-ish, S03E18)
- "Such a sweet little baby, and me, your very own walking, talking fungus." (Legion, S01E06)
- Craig Kilborn (Workaholics, S07E10)
- ♫: Asher Roth – "I Love College" (Workaholics, S07E10)
"This right here I don't understand. Why am I not the guy in the chair?"
"Adam, that's not how a bar mitzvah works."
"I thought I was DJ-ing at a sports bar called 'Bar Mitt Fuzz.' It's a bar mitt and there's fuzz in it." (Workaholics, S07E10)
- Workaholics Season Grade: D-
- "Two Boones for one dollar?" (Baskets, S02E09)
- "We'll have one cup of liquid cheese and an application, please." (Baskets, S02E09)
- "If somebody gave you a Quiznos franchise, you'd run it into the ground." (Baskets, S02E09)
- "Suze Orman is not a bitch." (Baskets, S02E09)
- My Dinner with Andre (Nirvanna the Band the Show, S01E07)
"I don't need any more noodles."
"But I do, so fuck him and fuck you too. [pause] Eminem." (Nirvanna the Band the Show, S01E07)
Still the AR™TV World Drama Champion: Legion
Still the AR™TV World Comedy Champion: Baskets