At an extended family dinner: "My sister's children's favourite restaurant is The Village Pub."
Me, in my head: [spit-take] Your sister's children's favourite place to eat is a Michelin-starred $$$$ restaurant?
"They love the pasta."
WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!
Previously on Adam Riff™:
I don't think [B] trusts me with her kids, never mind that I pick them up from school, like, every other day.
Jon: M, let's go.
Classmate: Are you M's father?
Jon: Heh. No. My son lives in Japan and is in junior high.
S: I'm hungry!
Jon: Okay… What do you want to eat?
S: Ice cream!
Jon: Ice cream. Ah. What flavour? Chocolate? Strawberry?
S: Salted caramel!
Jon: What are you doing?
M: Making an RPG with my friend.
Jon: Via Google Drive?
Jon: B, how did you find this school where first-graders use Google Drive and third-graders analyze scenes from Gravity in class?