Adam Riff™ Clip of the Week

4. "If You Were A Black Guy" (The Midnight Beast, S02E01)

Honourable Mention

Stray Observations

  • Music: "You Better Run" – Dr. C.J. Johnson (True Detective, S01E02)
  • "The hubris it must take to yank a soul out of non-existence into this…meat, and to force a life into this…thresher. Yeah, so my daughter, she, uh…she spared me the sin of being a father." (True Detective, S01E02)
  • "Back then, the visions, most of the time, I was convinced that I'd lost it. But there were other times, I thought I was mainlining the secret truth of the universe." (True Detective, S01E02)
  • Three cast members of Greek (Shameless, S04E02)
  • "My father only screwed a Mexican whore while he was with my mom, and they can't get pregnant." (Shameless, S04E02)
  • "You're a freshman."
    "Yeah, but I fuck like a sophomore." (Shameless, S04E02)
  • "She wants me to abort my baby!"
    "Over my dead sperm…" (Shameless, S04E02)

Gaby Hoffman's bush (Girls, S03E03)

  • I dig the naturalistic tone (Looking, S01E01)
  • "Really? A winking smiley face?"
    "What's wrong with that?"
    "What are you, a Japanese teenager?"
    "I– What?!"
    "Look, I was a Japanese teenager. I didn't even use a winking smiley face." (Looking, S01E01)
  • "With Asian parents, you have three options: doctor, engineer, or get beaten." (MasterChef Canada, S01E01)
  • Brock Lesnar trips over monitor, hurls it into ring (WWE Raw, 01-20-14)
  • "Zombie George Washington?" (Sleepy Hollow, S01E12)
  • "Remarkable stitching. An old flame of mine was a seamstress. She'd be most impressed."
    "Who'd you date? Betsy Ross?"
    "…How did you know that?" (Sleepy Hollow, S01E12)
  • Alien John Cho (Sleepy Hollow, S01E12)
  • "Prophecies have a nasty way of fulfilling themselves, if you let them." (Sleepy Hollow, S01E12)
  • "Does an alderman have an unwarranted self-regard?" (Sleepy Hollow, S01E12)
  • "You and I will choose our own destiny. We have free will. I choose to forge my fate with you." (Sleepy Hollow, S01E12)
  • "So does this mean we can finally give away that ratty coat?"
    "Please… And risk it be worn ironically by purveyors of artisanal marmalade who discovered it at a local thrift shop? I thank you, no. For judge a man not by the wear of what he wears, but by the where and how he wears it." (Sleepy Hollow, S01E13)
  • Diagetic piano gag (Sleepy Hollow, S01E13)
  • Sleepy Hollow Season Grade: B+

Pam eating a cocaine cast (Archer, S05E02)

  • "She's all…coke-strong." (Archer, S05E02)
  • "Oh my God, Lana, Lana, you know what I could totally go for right now?"
    "Some cocaine?" (Archer, S05E02)
  • "Hi, I'm Mr. Booby Buyer." (Rick and Morty, S01E05)
  • "That's my new thing. I'm kinda like, what's his name, Arsenio." (Rick and Morty, S01E05)
  • "" (Chozen, S01E02)
  • Skin-colour-matching KKK hoods/robes (Chozen, S01E02)
  • "I'll be your rock – the Dwayne Johnson kind." (Chozen, S01E02)
  • "This is a classy tipi!" (Brooklyn Nine-Nine, S01E14)
  • "Do you know any, like, time-consuming and free activities in Griffith Park?"
    "Gross! …Suicide?" (New Girl, S03E13)
  • "Sure you know how to tap a keg?"
    "How hard could it be? It's beer, for crying out loud. It's the drink of idiots." (New Girl, S03E13)
  • "A lot of people never graduated high school – Einstein, Bill Gates, Anne Frank… I'm gonna take back that last one." (New Girl, S03E13)
  • "Pussy is a powerful thing." (Justified, S05E03)
  • "Does this restaurant have blow jobs on the menu?" (Justified, S05E03)
  • "DJ Ango is…chained." (Workaholics, S04E01)
  • "I'm coven guard dog." – cringe! (American Horror Story, S03E12)
  • Nigella Lawson is a terrible judge of talent (The Taste, S02E04)
  • "Look, chard is disgusting. You try selling it without sexy dancers. It's impossible. It's like, 'Hey, you like lettuce? Try this, it's worse.' It tastes like kale took a dump on spinach."
    "I like to think of it as celery with B.O." (Parks and Recreation, S06E12)
  • "This is an excellent rectangle!" (Parks and Recreation, S06E12)
  • "It wasn't marijuana. It was heirloom tomatoes. [to the tomatoes] I'll see you at tonight's arrabbiata." (Enlisted, S01E03)
  • "Have a seat, buddy. Wait, stand."
    "I'll split the difference." (Enlisted, S01E03)
  • "Shot break! […] Ha! Nobody expects gin!" (Enlisted, S01E03)
  • "We're like a yogurt commercial." (Enlisted, S01E03)
  • "Jeffrey has a tummy ache!" (Saturday Night Live, S39E12)
  • "Great gash mileage." (Saturday Night Live, S39E12)


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