"Excuse me. Do you have any eating utensils?"

In my haste to board the plane to secure overhead cabin space to prevent my bag from being checked, I had forgotten to grab a fork and knife from an airport eatery for a cake that I had been nursing all afternoon.

"Sorry, no."

Licking ganache off a MetroCard – not my finest moment.

I can stream video to my laptop while sitting in the sky, yet we still can't land a plane with my seat reclined 10°.

Why do army men and women wear fatigues when flying commercial? Can't they change clothes at their destinations? If it's to receive special treatment, can't they just flash army IDs?

I despise Boingo, and all airports that enable its "service."

I'm always curious to see what is open in an airport at dawn and at midnight.

Wine shop is closed at 6:15 AM, but a spa and a candy shop are open, as is a Google Chromebook kiosk.

A Coach store is open, in case I need a handbag at 11:45 PM.