Fantasy MLB Commissioner

Ben: oh STOP IT
Ben: just STOP IT
Ben: you are making the xfl
Jon: you mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling


» Eliminate divisions, and divide the 32 30 teams up into a 16-team Premier League and a 14-team Major League, irrespective of American League or National League affiliation.

Example:

Premier League (PL) Major League (ML)
Philadelphia Phillies
Boston Red Sox
New York Yankees
Atlanta Braves
San Francisco Giants
Texas Rangers
Milwaukee Brewers
Arizona Diamondbacks
Los Angeles Angels
Detroit Tigers
St. Louis Cardinals
Tampa Bay Rays
Pittsburgh Pirates
Toronto Blue Jays
New York Mets
Cleveland Indians
Florida Marlins
Cincinnati Reds
Chicago White Sox
Washington Nationals
Colorado Rockies
Minnesota Twins
Oakland Athletics
Los Angeles Dodgers
San Diego Padres
Kansas City Royals
Seattle Mariners
Baltimore Orioles
Chicago Cubs
Houston Astros

» Interleague play becomes games between PL and ML teams.

» Teams maintain AL or NL affiliation, so a Phillies at Red Sox PL game would be played by AL rules.

» Only PL teams can participate in postseason play. However, at the end of every regular season, before postseason play begins, the top four teams in the ML are promoted to the PL, and the bottom four teams in the PL and demoted to the ML, so a team can begin its season in the ML and still win the World Series.

Example:

Premier League (PL) Major League (ML)
Philadelphia Phillies
Boston Red Sox
New York Yankees
Atlanta Braves
San Francisco Giants
Texas Rangers
Milwaukee Brewers
Arizona Diamondbacks
Los Angeles Angels
Detroit Tigers
St. Louis Cardinals
Tampa Bay Rays
+ Florida Marlins
+ Cincinnati Reds
+ Chicago White Sox
+ Washington Nationals
– Pittsburgh Pirates
– Toronto Blue Jays
– New York Mets
– Cleveland Indians

Colorado Rockies
Minnesota Twins
Oakland Athletics
Los Angeles Dodgers
San Diego Padres
Kansas City Royals
Seattle Mariners
Baltimore Orioles
Chicago Cubs
Houston Astros

» Throughout the month of October, all 16 PL teams compete in a championship tournament. Seeds are determined by regular season record, with the four promoted ML teams seeded 12 through 16.

Example:

» Reduce the regular season from 162 to 120 games, and begin it after Mother's Day. You avoid residual winter weather, and spring training actually happens in springtime.

» Move All-Star Weekend to the end of July.

» Televise the Futures Game in prime time.

» For the All-Star Game, fans vote on two player-managers (one PL, one ML) and 48 all-star players (irrespective of league). The two player-managers schoolyard pick their teams and any replacement players during the seventh inning stretch of the Futures Game.

» Instead of home field advantage in the World Series, all-star teams compete for $25 million, or $1 million per player.

» Turn the Home Run Derby into an Olympic-style event. Seven countries (USA, Canada, Cuba, Dominican Republic, Japan, Mexico, Venezuela) and Puerto Rico each appoint a participant. Participants don't have to be MLB players.

» Each Home Run Derby participant has five minutes to home-run as many tennis balls as he can with an aluminum bat.

» The winner of the Home Run Derby advances to a bonus round. We float a briefcase filled with $1 million and U.S. citizenship papers for two above centre field with balloons, and the Derby winner has five minutes to pop enough balloons so that he can retrieve the briefcase.

» Managers and coaches can wear whatever they want.

» A team can challenge two umpire calls, any two calls, per game. Challenges are reviewed by replay officials at MLB's New York City headquarters.

» If a game continues past 12 innings, after the 12th inning, we rotate umpires and install a fresher home plate umpire.

» To cut down on marathon regular season games, every two extra innings, managers must remove one fielder, any position, from the game.

Example:

10th inning 8 players on the field; no shortstop
11th inning 8 players on the field; no shortstop
12th inning 7 players on the field; no left fielder or shortstop
13th inning 7 players on the field; no left fielder or shortstop
14th inning 6 players on the field; no left fielder, right fielder, or shortstop
15th inning 6 players on the field; no left fielder, right fielder, or shortstop
16th inning 5 players on the field; no outfielders or shortstop
17th inning 5 players on the field; no outfielders or shortstop

» While the number of fielders decreases in extra innings, the number of batters does not. If they want, managers can designate hitters to replace removed fielders.

» From the 18th inning on, every half-inning begins with a runner or runners already on base.

Example:

18th inning 5 players on the field; free runner on first base
19th inning 5 players on the field; free runner on first base
20th inning 5 players on the field; free runners on first and second base
21st inning 5 players on the field; free runners on first and second base
22nd inning 5 players on the field; free bases loaded
23rd inning 5 players on the field; free bases loaded

» In the postseason, extra innings are played like regular innings.

4 thoughts on "Fantasy MLB Commissioner"

  1. I "liked" it, because it's well outside of the box and I've been told to "dare to dream" by Jon, but this shit is fucking straight up bonkers.

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