Oh, Goddamnit

I don't understand why cannibalism is so taboo. Humans are no more sacred than pigs.

While I would never seek out human meat to eat, I wouldn't hesitate to eat it either. Preparing a body for consumption would require some acclimating though.

—if I just wanted to try human meat, I would rather it be prepared for me
—by someone who knows the best way to prepare it

Would I eat my parents?

If I absolutely had to, and they were already dead, and I wasn't cooking. I'm not sure I could fillet and de-skin my parents.

idea: A horror film about a chef who farms humans for use in his restaurant. In one scene, the chef shoves a tube down a young woman's esophagus and force-feeds her corn to fatten her liver.

I saw an ad in the Sunday paper for


lifelike vinyl baby dolls dressed as M&M's.

Only $29.99 each!

I couldn't find Cherry 7UP in the pop aisle at Safeway and worried that it'd been discontinued. Nope, my local Safeway just sucks.


Ebert:

The following paragraph appeared this week in a New York Post review by Adam Buckman of the season premiere of "Heroes."

This show, which was once so thrilling and fun, has become full of itself, its characters spouting crazy nonsense. Here's one I wish someone would translate for me: "There's a divinity that shapes our ends—rough hew them how we will," spouts the enigmatic industrialist Linderman played by Malcolm McDowell, who should win an Emmy for keeping a straight face while reciting these lines.

Perhaps McDowell kept a straight face because he knew he was quoting one of the most famous speeches in Hamlet. I don't expect everyone to have read Hamlet, but I would hope a New York critic might have run across it once or twice.

I think Adrian Pasdar could play Don Draper.

On Dancing with the Stars, Lance Bass and his partner quickstepped to "Close to Me."

I didn't expect J.D. Roth to last so long in television. Way to leverage Fun House.

NBC should replace American Gladiators with an update of College Mad House.

Apropos of nothing, remember the dating show Studs? Good times…


THE GREATEST ENGINEERING ACHIEVEMENT OF THE 21st CENTURY
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Bill O'Reilly Gets Hacked
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3 Comments

  1. hugo 24 Sep 08 at 04:50

    HOLY SHIT THAT WARIO LINK IS FREAKING AMAZING!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  2. Andy 24 Sep 08 at 23:30

    One of my favorite horror movies of all time is Motel Hell. They harvest people and bury them up to their necks in a "garden". Feed them with a snorkel beer bong apparatus and hook their necks up to a tractor yanking them out killing them in the process. Smoke the torso and there you have it "Farmer Vincent's Fameous Smoked Meats" Cameo by John Ratzenberger among others. Campy must see. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081184/

    Reply
  3. Jon 25 Sep 08 at 03:40

    I was thinking more French torture porn.

    Reply

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