The new round of "Trapped in the Closet" videos finds R. Kelly portraying an old man named Randolph, complete with a pot belly and a fake white beard that nearly falls off mid-scene, as well as a preacher in a gray Jheri-curl wig and garish…
Date Archives July 2007
Delusion
noun a persistent false psychotic belief regarding the self or persons or objects outside the self that is maintained despite indisputable evidence to the contrary
Addendum, assface.
Ben spent Monday at the beach with his pro-life girlfriend. His girlfriend built a fetus out of sand. Then, Ben destroyed the sand fetus in front of his girlfriend. He clams that it's one of the funniest things he's ever done. [pause] You can't rate…
Under Covers Over You
When I first heard that season three of Weeds features a cover of "Little Boxes" by Linkin Park, I didn't believe the news. Well, Linkin Park covered the show's theme song. I wonder if their version includes any clapping. Producers received over 90 covers of…
I would never kill a hooker
Jimmy Kimmel was poking fun at the fact that Flavor Flav has several children with several different women, when he said that "Chris Benoit is a better father than you." [source] • Live Blog: Flav Gets Roasted The smell of bleach intoxicates me. I have…
Bomb. Repeat. Bomb.
Dear Rihanna: Your song is hella ella ella gay gay gay. [pause] Frank Jacobs I am not. • Yo! Indie Rock Raps • Slashing The Defense Gameplay
Keep churning out those hits 'til it's all the same old shit
Bwah! Thaves should write for The Simpsons. Bob Thaves died last year. Like several comic strips, Frank and Ernest survives because his son took over. I've often wondered what compels children of cartoonists to continue their fathers' work. You only live once, and you want…
Oakland Art and Soul Festival
Saturday, September 1 (Live 105 day) Jack London Square $10 at door Ted Leo and the Pharmacists Against Me! The Lovemakers Great Northern Army of Me Audrye Sessions According to Army of Me's MySpace page, the band will transition from opening for Dave Matthews Band…
Hair Supply
Nathan: Bangs and a beard in season two? "I haven't touched it since we wrapped." Spinner: Bald in season seven? I suppose that's one way to avoid another unfortunate hairstyle. • Help Us Pick America's Most Annoying Liberal Arts College
Box Populi
Every year, people complain about how lame Oscar nominations/winners are, and then the Eh-mmys come along to put everything in perspective. This year's nominees for 'Outstanding Reality Program' and 'Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series' are exactly the same as last year's nominees. 'Outstanding Main…