Addendum, assface.

Ben spent Monday at the beach with his pro-life girlfriend.
His girlfriend built a fetus out of sand.
Then, Ben destroyed the sand fetus in front of his girlfriend.
He clams that it's one of the funniest things he's ever done.
[pause]
You can't rate the hilarity of your own actions!

To be fair, I also yelled out "ABORTED" when I smashed it. Jon failed to mention this. And it was hilarious.