"Are you right-handed?" "Yeah." "You wear your watch on your dominant hand?" "Evidently." "It's not a nuisance when you jerk off?" "I'm sorry?" "It doesn't, you know, retard motion?" "Not really… Besides, I can jerk off with my left hand too." "You can?" "You can't?"…
Date Archives July 2007
Mess with the best, die like the rest
Fuuuuuck! While shaving my head, I noticed that my hairline is receding. "Kung Fu Tootsie" beat "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" to top the Thai box office for the second consecutive weekend. [source] The film is an action comedy about a triad…
Big Fish
Black Monday begets a question: Whose funeral would you like to attend purely for stargazing? I say Judd Apatow or Lorne Michaels. • Time to Evacuate Northern California
America's Best Sports City
Boston Red Sox – Best record in baseball as of today. New England Patriots – Randy Moss? Tom Brady? Adalius Thomas? Bill Belichick? AFC Title, please. Boston Celtics – Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce, and Ray Allen. Name one team in the NBA with three players…
The Filth and the Fury
Rock Band update! Nirvana's album Nevermind will be playable in full. Moreover, the game features 41 real venues in cities like: Amsterdam, Berlin, Boston, Chicago, London, Los Angeles, Moscow, New York, Paris, Seattle, San Francisco, Sydney and Tokyo. I hope the Los Angeles venue is…
Being independent doesn't mean being alone
I headed up to the city on Saturday to see Charlie Bartlett. Ah… Summer in the city… Bring a jacket! I normally wouldn't bother with the two-hour round-trip commute, but IMDb listed four Degrassi: The Next Generation actors in the cast. Anton Yelchin plays the…
The Simpsons Movie
Bigger opening day than Transformers. 17th biggest opening day of all time (right behind Attack of the Clones). Best single day this summer. Biggest industry opening day ever in Australia, Argentina, Columbia and Chile. Biggest animated opening day ever in Australia, Belgium, Finland, Germany, New…
Boys wanna battle so I got me a battle axe
Guitar Hero III announced "Number of the Beast" by Iron Maiden and "Through the Fire and Flames" by DragonForce as playable songs. DragonForce. Finally. Rock Band should counter with The Mars Volta. I caught an episode of Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations that was sponsored by…
You never know just how you look through other people's eyes
Name a scene from a movie that was so funny on first viewing that you cried/couldn't breathe/peed your pants. The scene need not hold up on repeat viewings, and bloopers don't qualify. Alex: naked borat fight Jord: the deleted scene from back to the future…
Ave Maria West
The Oakland A's previewed their vision for a new ballpark village development in Fremont. While there's much to be determined about what would go into the village, a set of deed restrictions filed last month reveal uses that will be excluded. Those uses include Goodwill…