Jay-Z, Jay-Z, it's D-D-P

Former wrestler Diamond Dallas Page is suing Jay-Z, claiming the hip-hop heavyweight illegally adopted his trademark hand gesture — the "Diamond Cutter" — as his own.

Page's lawyer, George Gallegos, said Page brought legal action against the Def Jam CEO in order to protect his livelihood.

because a hand gesture is integral to his acting career

"People would come up to him and ask him if he was letting Jay-Z use it or if he had licensed it to him," Gallegos said of the symbol, which he claims his client created in 1996 and copyrighted years ago. "People [would also] say he's using Jay-Z's sign."

were these people by any chance agents and lawyers?

"If you look at [Jay-Z's] 'Encore' video you can see fans using the 'Diamond Cutter' sign, and in video of Diamond Dallas … if you only looked at the fans from both those tapes, you'd think it's the same person performing," Gallegos said.

gaudy misspelled signage notwithstanding

"The way that it's being used by Jay-Z and Roc-A-Fella is taking value away from it and creating confusion upon the public."

1. the "diamond cutter" still has value?

2. what confusion? page retired from wrestling and jay-z retired from recording and rarely performs live

Who Page ought to sue is (active) wrestler Randy Orton for stealing his "diamond cutter" finishing move.

When Diamond Dallas Page debuted in the then World Wrestling Federation, he played the stalker of The Undertaker's wife, whom announcers referred to as "Sara Undertaker."

I never understood the logic behind her surname. It's very "Luigi Mario."

I mean, The Rock's wife isn't Dani Rock.

To be fair, The Ultimate Warrior's wife is, in fact, Dana Warrior, but only because he legally changed his name. His daughters were born Indiana and Mattigan Warrior.

They're "The Warriors"!

If The Punisher married Tony's sister, would she henceforth be Jane Jane or Jane Punisher?

[tries hard to refrain from cracking a "Richard Punisher" joke]