I have Awesome Blossom coming out of my nose

Excerpts from a journal I randomly discovered via Google:

"Last weekend was amazing. Jarod, Bryan, and I got super stoned, huffed a bag of freon, and went inside the dollar movies and saw The Devil's Rejects."

"Today Bryan,Jarod, and I spent an hour today looking for pictures of the gap troll from mad tv on the internet."

"We found the cemetary after much exploration and we got to smoke some salvia and attempt to contact the dead with a saience, too bad there was too much madness going on. Crazy drunken madness, kids puking on graves, I'm allmost positive one kid was bashing cement crosses onto other peoples tombstones."

"Tearing through the yards of Bartlet's most prestiegoius homes at the country club. I broke a bunch of shit, came home with a shit load of souvineers, bumbs, and bruses, and chewed an American flag off the pole. It was one of the best nights of my life."

"Matt and I got shitty again and went to Mike Dunlaps party. All I know is that I was naked and drunk. Apparently I kept putting my penis on random people, mostly Brian. Some old guy with a flute gave Matt and I some acid in pecans and it was fun. I superman flew off of a roof, with my american flag cape (the half chewed symbol of American Fuckbag Pride) firmly attached to me in the fassion of a cape."

"I tripped mushrooms hard a few weeks ago and it was amazing. The guy that I got them from said that if I ate the whole bag I could have them. I did it!"

"Yesterday I went riding with chris and got so fucked up on oc's, coke, and bud that I thought I was aonna die! I got home late and couldn't go to sleep…go figure…so mom gave me some ambien and some risperdaul."

"So much has happend since I last updated. I went on a week long XTC benge and didn't sleep or eat much. It was awesome."

"I got fucked up with Jarod and I drank a liter of vodka, took some hc's, and ate two of the best bud brownies made from a half of AK47. I was super fucked up. The last day of [said "benge"], I was supposed to come down and I drank a half a bottle of liquid zanax to help me sleep. It made me crazy! I did everything but sleep. I drank a 40oz and took a bottle of dramimine, uhhhhh!"

"When I had the urge to puke, I ran to the bathroom and blacked out before I got there. I awake in the woods and I'm freakin out. It is nuts. I start calling everyone I know frantically. I tell them to get a hold of Matt because he's the last person I remember seeing. Chase and Leia are calling everyone I hang out with and in the mean time I'm hallucinating really hard and I see Jarod. He tells me that everything is ok and we're in Heber Springs, camping. I then call everyone back to tell them that i'm ok and I'm camping at Heber."

[pause]

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