I promise never to get paint on my glasses again


2. Today on 30 Minute Meals, Rachael Ray prepared a meal that reminded her of her dead dog.

In addition, she regaled viewers with impressions of her dead dog.

Dead dog.


3. photos of Rachael Ray in FHM

4. Lou Taylor Pucci (Thumbsucker) plays the titular character in Green Day's video for "Jesus of Suburbia," directed by Samuel Bayer.

Previously: Bayer cast Jamie Bell (Undertow) and Evan Rachel Wood (Thirteen) in his video for Green Day's "Wake Me Up When September Ends."

Someone's a fan of "25 under 25" lists…

5. This plane is definitely crashing!

I applied for a job assisting a graduate journalism student who suffered from Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

He needed somebody to help edit (proofread, cut and paste) text for him as he wrote via voice recognition software.

The day after interviewing with him, he e-mailed to inform me that he'd decided to withdraw from school for the quarter.

What does it say about me when I can't even get a job operating a keyboard and mouse?

6. The smartest state in the union for the second consecutive year is Massachusetts.

The dumbest, for the third year in a row, is New Mexico.

Apparently, it's possible to be smart and believe in intelligent design.

7. Jord revealed that he once tried to set me up on Scare Tactics.

"Honest to God…"

He thought it'd be funny if feds accused me of molesting the WankerCounty crew, whom I met online.