As heard on Stern, Nick DiPaolo's introduction for Halle Berry that Chris Rock wanted to use but didn't: "Our next presenter has lost more men than the war in Iraq." Moving on… 005: Destiny's Child "Independent Woman (Part 1)" [Charlie's Angels; 2000] Yes, this song…
Date Archives February 2005
BOMB O havoc antiphony molten cleft BOOM
The lead singer of Taking Back Sunday is such a tool. While waiting for a fish burrito today, I caught the band's latest video on MTVU. The singer tries so hard to be a rock star. Keep flailing about and flinging your mic, buddy. How…
All agents defect and all resisters sell out
Hootie's now shilling for Burger King in commercials reminiscent of the 2005 NBA All-Star Game halftime show. Meanwhile… 015: Clint Mansell and The Kronos Quartet "Summer Overture" [Requiem for a Dream; 2000] Just as Requiem for a Dream isn't for the squeamish or easily nightmared,…
The wheel of the quivering meat conception
The saga continues… 020: Jack Black "Night of the Griffin" [Run, Ronnie, Run; 2002] About halfway through, Run, Ronnie, Run breaks out of narrative completely, randomly cutting to a fictional journey through cinematic censorship involving a delightfully obscene spoof of the chimney-sweep scene in Mary…
Destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked
And the nominees for Best Original Song are… "Accidentally in Love" from Shrek 2 "Al Otro Lado Del Rio" from The Motorcycle Diaries "Believe" from The Polar Express "Learn to Be Lonely" from The Phantom of the Opera and "Vois Sur Ton Chemin" from The…
Your semen is a rainbow
I caught the last few minutes of a Michigan State vs. Ohio State women's basketball game on ESPN2. During that time, an announcer said, "Every time that woman has come off penetration, good things happen." Apparently, this basketball game drew the largest crowd in Breslin…
All good sinners go to hell
If all goes well, I'll be in Chicago from March 3-4 and Ann Arbor from March 5-6. More on this later. I wonder how 50 Cent can say "I'll let you lick the lollipop" with a straight face. The television series Las Vegas has become…
Quickie
I didn't think Ain't It Cool News' website could be any more hideous. I was wrong.
New Jersey's where America's at
My buddy Jose's flying to New York City today to interview people at Rockstar Games. Rockstar supposedly doesn't grant very many interviews. Jose claims to be the first mainstream press reporter to score one (or several, rather). Good for him. [pause] I attended a Green…
Cover Story
Ssssssssssmokin'! The Mask is a mystic artifact that transforms its wearer into a psychotic living cartoon. Created in Africa, it's stolen and brought to the United States for sale. The first wearer of the Mask in modern times is neurotic Stanley Ipkiss (played by Jim…