You get the ankles and I'll get the wrists

—they should rename the MTV video music awards to the BET music video awards. HOLLER.

Dobi's brother Dan supposedly helped catch the lead singer of Yellowcard when he stage-dived. Dobi said he was wearing a blue Polo shirt. I saw a long blue sleeve. Does Polo make long-sleeve shirts?

I know this girl Kaity who, as part of the USC marching band, performed "Hey Ya!" with Andre 3000 at the Grammys in February.

Andre 3000 at the Video Music Awards:
—Okay, and for the millionth time, "Hey Ya!," goddammit…

In case you missed the Video Music Awards, here's a recap:
Miami! Party! Miami! Party! [Jay-Z reaction shot] Miami! Party! M-I-A! Choose or lose! Vote or die! rock music Miami! Party! [Jay-Z reaction shot].

With all the visibly empty seats in the arena, I had to make sure I wasn't watching the Olympics. MTV should have moved people in the nosebleed seats down a tier and covered the upper tier with black tarps like WWE does.

Kurt Loder: So what's your album like, Paris?
Paris Hilton: It comes out in January.

I hate that bleached fauxhawk that Ashlee Simpson's guitarist has. He looks like an ethnically-ambiguous poser with a skunk on his head.

I hate how the lead singer of New Found Glory likes to point his mic at the audience. I saw the band in June and he kept pointing his mic at the audience. I didn't pay to hear songs with dropped lyrics all over the place.

I hate awards show performance medleys. Musical artists: pick a song and perform it. If I wanted to hear shitty samples of your music, I'd visit

I thought it was fitting that New Found Glory performed "All Downhill From Here" on the Video Music Awards pre-show.

I hate people who call it the "VMAs."

For a quality celebration of music videos, I suggest attending Resfest, a traveling digital film festival that launches next week in New York City.

Each year, the festival programs two blocks of music videos. I've attended screenings in previous years and highly recommend them.

The 2004 "Videos That Rock" program includes the videos for:
"Televators" by The Mars Volta
"Walkie Talkie Man" by Steriogram
"Take Me Out" by Franz Ferdinand
"Staring at the Sun" by TV on the Radio
"Assessments" by The Beta Band
"Float On" by Modest Mouse
"Sing for Absolution" by Muse
"So Says I" by The Shins
"Spokes on the Wheel of Torment" by Buckethead
"Exotic Talk" by RJD2and 13 more

The 2004 "Cinema Electronica" program includes the videos for:
"Electronic Performers" by Air
"Get Yourself High" by The Chemical Brothers
"Fit But You Know It" by The Streets
"Cish Cash" by Basement Jaxx
"Good Luck" by Basement Jaxx
"Needy Girl" by Chromeo
"Rocket Ride" by Felix Da Housecat
"Biting Tongues" by Faultline
"All Caps" by Madvillain
"Twist" by Goldfrapp
"Sometimes" by Kid606
and 12 more

This year's festival also features a Johnathan Glazer (Sexy Beast) retrospective that includes his videos for:
"Street Spirit" by Radiohead
"Virtual Insanity" by Jamiroquai
"Karma Police" by Radiohead
"Rabbit in Your Headlights" by UNKLE

Look out for Resfest this fall if you live in: New York City, Boston, San Francisco, London (UK), Austin (TX), Los Angeles, Portland (OR), Toronto, Washington D.C., Chicago or Sydney (AU).