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Here are some things I saw on television in Japan:
Oliver Beene dubbed in Japanese
—footage of a snail pooping
—a commercial for what looked like orange juice that used the Welcome Back, Kotter theme song
—a commercial for McDonald's that used an oi punk song ("Oi oi oi / I'm lovin' it")

I was flipping through channels (all 12 of them, two of which were QVC) and came upon a newsmagazine exposé on men who steal women's underwear from laundromats.

Security camera footage of various men going through strangers' laundry was shown and in each case, the screen would freeze and zoom in and highlight a blurry, barely-visible blur in the thief's hands.

Then, someone interviewed a woman who had her panties stolen at a laundromat and her face was concealed by a giant red dot.

The woman said that she was afraid that the person who stole her panties would come after her and then pointed out to the camera all the places in her apartment where she thought said thief could get in…like the ceiling of her bedroom closet.

This is what passes for investigative reporting in Japan.