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On the Hawaii auditions episode of American Idol last week, Aaron Flora, the drummer for the band Throwdown, sang a rendition of "I Think I Love You" by David Cassidy. When he walked in, Paula asked —Are you barefoot? and when he finished snapping and singing, Simon remarked —Your performance was a wipeout, assuming that Aaron was a surfer.

Ice Cube in a commercial for Barbershop 2:
—A real barbershop got real people and most of all, good barbers.

The dramatic voice-over guy in a teaser for the Fox 11 10 o'clock News:
—Then: Janet and Justin's boobylicious performance.

Scooter Girl on American Idol needs a good kick in the cunt. You can't sing, you're not funny and you need to lose weight.

ABC News Edwards Campaign Reporter Gloria Riviera on Nightline:
—It has been confirmed that Hootie and all the Blowfish are on board for Edwards.

Salon has an interesting article on John Kerry's dysfunctional family, which includes ketchup heiress Teresa Heinz and a reclusive Buddhist blacksmith who runs a school for wayward kids.