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I'm sick of always hearing
All those sad songs on the radio
This place, it's fucking cursed and it's plagued
And I can never escape when my heart it explodes

I can't forgive
Can't forget
Can't give in
What went wrong
'Cause you said this was right
You fucked up my life
Blink 182"What Went Wrong?"

Exactly three years ago, a chain of events began which resulted in my indefinite suspension from high school five days before I was to graduate. Guilt and bitterness over what happened continue to eat at me to this day. I'm stuck in a moment I can't get out of. My high school classmates mock me for still caring. They tell me to grow up.

Okay. Let's grow up, Jon.

This is the last time I will publicly discuss my underage emasculation. After 06.13, the story's going back in the vault.

06.05.00
Tavenner | My Yearbook Advisor + Assistant Principal
Jon, I am deeply hurt by what you did. You betrayed me.

There's a reason we pulled Senior Superlatives from the yearbook. You saw how students were upset with the awards they won and you still went behind my back and published them in the Oracle. I can't believe you.

Did you know that Chris Brooks came up to me today and complained about being featured in the Oracle as "Biggest Brownnoser"?

We should have had a discussion about this beforehand.

Jon, you have to realize that I care deeply about the students at this school. When you do something like this…it hurts.

[crying]


Farrell | U.S. History AP Teacher
Big throbbing erections, eh?

Junior year, I do a DIVE presentation on the rise and fall of the mental institution and/or the mentally ill. I play a mentally retarded Southerner in a one-act play. I develop giant throbbing erections every time I looked at Mrs. Tavenner. I'm beginning to think that there's something seriously wrong with me.

Farrell
Hey Matt, did you read Jon's column?

Neely | Assistant Principal
UGH. Jon Yu disgusts me.

Farrell
What? What about him? The column?

Neely
The column…everything. Everything about him just disgusts me. I can't even look at him while I'm saying this! Do you know how much legal shit we could end up in because of what he wrote?


Paul | Drama Teacher
You know, to tell you the truth, I thought parts of your column were really funny.


Me
Here I was worried that I'd get in trouble over the picture of Derek holding a shot glass in the yearbook and turns out it's things in the newspaper that get me in trouble instead. Heh.

TO BE CONTINUED

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