i know what yu did last weekend

After spending Easter in Arizona, the Adam Riff™ Media Empire struck back Memorial Day weekend. It was a lot of fun. You should try it sometime.

I've seen WankerCounty Jord and his friends more than I've seen my parents this year.

The job of priests stationed in airports panhandling for starving African children can best be described as "the shit end of the stick." I feel for them like I feel for cops who have to ride bikes or control screaming teenage girls in Times Square.

With the exception of its Navajo region, Arizona does not observe Daylight Saving. Half of the year, the state operates on Mountain time, while the other half it goes by Pacific time. Television, however, is broadcast according to Central time year round. Gosh, I'd hate to live there and suck at math.

A bug bit me right above an artery or a vein (I can't tell) in the middle of my right wrist. Whenever I visit hot places, I get bug bites like whoa. I'm still waiting though for that overnight six-pack and 20/10 vision.

Jord dropped me off at Sky Harbor in the arrivals area.

On the flight back to Los Angeles, the pilot said: "in the event of a water evacuation over the desert…"

Jord's Catholic buddy Steve brought to my attention that the current issue of Teen People features an interview with Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman in which Christensen comes off like an idiot savant, minus the "savant" part. You can read the interview here.

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