"huzzah" When I was in high school, it was "cool" to be atheist. People would call themselves "atheist" without the slightest clue as to what atheism entails. I'd hear this a lot: "I'm atheist. I hate organized religion. You suck because you practice [insert organized…
Date Archives January 2002
has anyone seen my potential?
"fap fap fap" Jon Yu does John Q. A down-on-his luck father whose insurance won't cover his son's heart transplant takes a hospital's emergency room hostage until doctors agree to perform the operation. Mediocre. Not good, but not awful. A lot better than it had…
binge thinking
"pepto-bismol, please" In a desperate move to increase television ratings, Vince McMahon re-signed Hulk Hogan to the WWF Friday. Hulk…Hogan. 49-year-old Hulk Hogan. Granted, it's not the end of the world. Hulk Hogan did sell the most tickets in WWF history. Plus, people never really…
fuck this shit
"this is the last time we do movie reviews" 7 storytelling re: two separate stories ("fiction" and "non-fiction") set against the sadly comical terrain of college and high school, past and present, explore issues of sex, race, celebrity and exploitation jon says: [clears throat] "what…
not so talky with a belly full of hell
"who is super now?" I remember my first Sony. In fact, I had it in the back seat of my '85 Honda Civic because I couldn't find any place for it in my house. Got it for cheap too. Adam once told me that he…
potent potables
"what is a regis philbin?" Well, fuck. Now that Mr. Wilcox has effectively raped my comedic arsenal for the next two weeks, I'm stuck with poster's block (a.k.a. Robotskull syndrome). I think it's time we have another lightning round. Wake up the kids, people, because…
soundtrack to marry
"i hope you feel better later on, alex and seth" I didn't plan on posting today, but I can't sleep. As I sit here typing, six feet away from me, my roommate and his incredibly hot girlfriend wallow in carnality. The physical act doesn't bother…
analog boy in a digital world
"error 404" Jon: [sigh] [takes a drag off a cigarette] Jon: We need to talk. [pause] There's gotta be an easier way to entertain the masses because this…between us…it just isn't working. We don't…click. In fact, when I'm around you, I get depressed. [takes another…
son of a gun, son of a bitch, gettin' paid, gettin' rich
"it's gonna getcha" Heil Seinfeld! Where does Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalog. I thought his penis got smaller as his body got whiter, but apparently, he went and shrunk another body part. My reaction to a camera panning up from her feet…
germans who say nice things
"she's vonce, tvice, sree times a lady!!!" Jon: [cough] Is the mic on? Yes? [sigh] Okay. Here we go. According to the Department of Justice, one out of five American women are victims of rape or sexual assault in their lifetime. 25 percent of women…