I'm done. Done done done. Did I mention that I'm done? Call me a done fuck because I'm well done with this school shit…until next week, when I return for summer sessions. That's one of the drawbacks of being Asian – you spend all your summers in school.

Epiphanies at 4:00 am:

I hate "times new roman." What an ugly font. I can't believe that teachers actually prefer to read this garish font.

I hate stapling papers. I like my staples to go in clean and straight and they never do. I usually end up stapling the same papers like five times in order to get it right. I'm anal that way.

I hate how expensive haircuts are. I forked over $10 the other day so some Jamaican lady could shave my head. And then…I had to tip her for doing so.

Who came up with the retarded practice of tipping? It seriously drains the money right out of your wallet, and for no good reason. Why should I give the stupid fuckin' haircut lady an extra dollar for a job she's already getting paid for? That goes for all you pizza delivery boys too! I'll be damned if I ever give you a buck for driving down the road to bring me a cheese pizza.

Now that I've effectively pissed off a quarter of the blue-collar workforce in America, how 'bout a joke?

Q: What's the difference between Pakistan and a pancake?
A: I don't remember a pancake ever getting nuked by India!
Thanks, Bob and Tony.

People Jose has met working in journalism:
Audra McDonald
Bill Clinton
Dave Matthews
Michelle Kwan
*NSYNC
Jesse Jackson
Sharon Stone
Peter Travers

People Jon has met working on this website:
some perv named "lezbianorgy87"
telemarketers

Here's something to keep you entertained during those boring summer days • go

Should Jonathan Yu go to Philadelphia this summer? (out of 13 votes)
Yes (Weezer owns…and visiting Jose would be cool too) • 13 votes • 100%
No (Weezer blows…and so does…never mind) • 0 votes • 0%
Who the fuck is Jonathan Yu? • 0 votes • 0%
[sigh] Philly, here I come.