Jonathan Yu's Television Of The Year…For White Trash

1 Who Wants To Marry A Multimillionaire? Fox
2 Big Brother CBS
3 The 2000 MTV Video Music Awards MTV
4 Anything With Chris Matthews NBC | CNBC | MSNBC
5 Change Of Heart Syndication
6 Surprise Wedding Fox
7 Behind The Music: Creed VH1
8 Mandy | Sisqo's Shakedown | Undressed MTV
9 Battle Of The Child Geniuses Fox
10 Sydney Olympics Coverage NBC

Jonathan Yu's Television Of The Year

1 Survivor CBS
2 The West Wing NBC
3 Malcolm In The Middle Fox
4 Jackass MTV
5 The Daily Show Comedy Central
6 Election Night Coverage
7 The Tom Green Cancer Special MTV
8 The Late Show With David Letterman CBS
9 Iron Chef Food Network
10 Ed NBC
11 The Simpsons Fox
13 WWF Raw Is War | SmackDown! TNN | UPN
14 Rock Of Ages VH1
15 Will And Grace (tie) NBC
Blind Date Syndication

Jonathan Yu's Movies Of The Year

1 Chicken Run Dreamworks
2 Traffic USA Films
3 Almost Famous Dreamworks
4 You Can Count On Me Paramount Classics
5 Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon Sony Pictures Classics
6 Chuck And Buck Artisan Entertainment
7 Quills Fox Searchlight
8 State And Main Fine Line Features
9 Best In Show Warner Brothers
10 Wonder Boys Paramount

Not screened at press time: CAST AWAY and DUDE, WHERE'S MY CAR?

Jonathan Yu's Recordings Of The Year

1 Radiohead Kid A
2 OutKast Stankonia
3 The Beatles 1
4 Eminem The Marshall Mathers LP
5 Bob Dylan The Essential Bob Dylan
6 Travis The Man Who
7 Zebrahead Playmate Of The Year
8 Blur The Best Of Blur
9 Good Charlotte Good Charlotte
10 At The Drive-In Relationship Of Command
11 U2 All That You Can't Leave Behind
12 De La Soul Art Official Intelligence: Mosaic Thump
13 PJ Harvey Stories From The City, Stories From The Sea
14 The Wallflowers Breach
15 Almost Famous Soundtrack
16 Coldplay Parachutes
17 D'Angelo Voodoo
18 Badly Drawn Boy The Hour Of Bewilderbeast
19 Madonna Music
20  Queens Of The Stone Age Rated R

Jonathan Yu's 100 Songs Of The Year

When we sat down to plan this special list, we took the arrival of the Backstreet Boys' "Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely" as the starting point of the year in music. Everything else was up for grabs. The staff and I traded lists, opinions, barbs and everything but blows in trying to narrow down a wide range of popular music to the final 100. Anthony was sorry to see video pioneer Madonna get cut; Carmen was pulling for more Brit Pop, particularly Belle And Sebastian's "Legal Man." And, believe it or not, everybody was a little sorry to see the Baha Men's one and only hit, "Who Let The Dogs Out," bite the dust early on.

That's because this list honors the innovative just as much as the generic. These are not necessarily the best songs of the year. Were that the case, you would see a lot more Radiohead. No, these are the songs released in 2000 that I liked the most, ranked according to their cultural impact. Love 'em or hate 'em, they are instantly recognizable…to me, which may be the only thing that Britney Spears' "Lucky" (No. 22) and Detsl's "Vecherinka" (No. 96) have in common.

Jonathan Yu's 100 Songs Of The Year is a true collaboration. And in the spirit of Los Angeles radio, if you get to a song you don't like, stick with it – another one's coming up in a couple of minutes.

1 *NSYNC Bye Bye Bye
2 Eminem The Real Slim Shady
3 Sisqó Thong Song
4 Papa Roach Last Resort
5 Dr. Dre featuring Eminem Forgot About Dre
6 Eminem featuring Dido Stan
7 Britney Spears Oops!…I Did It Again
8 Destiny's Child Say My Name
9 Nelly Country Grammar (Hot Shit)
10 Bloodhound Gang The Bad Touch
11 Macy Gray I Try
12 Red Hot Chili Peppers Otherside
13 Nine Days Absolutely (Story Of A Girl)
14 Aaliyah Try Again
15 soulDecision Faded
16 Jay-Z featuring UGK Big Pimpin'
17 Green Day Minority
18 Backstreet Boys The One
19 Barenaked Ladies Pinch Me
20 Hanson If Only
21 *NSYNC It's Gonna Be Me
22 Britney Spears Lucky
23 Eminem The Way I Am
24 Red Hot Chili Peppers Californication
25 U2 Beautiful Day
26 Bon Jovi It's My Life
27 OutKast B.O.B. (Bombs Over Baghdad)
28 Ricky Martin She Bangs (English Version)
29 Toni Braxton He Wasn't Man Enough
30 OutKast Ms. Jackson
31 Jurassic 5 Quality Control
32 Limp Bizkit Take A Look Around
(Theme From Mission: Impossible 2)
33 Dynamite Hack Boyz In The Hood
34 2Ge+her U + Me = Us (Calculus)
35 The Wallflowers Sleepwalker
36 D'Angelo Untitled (How Does It Feel)
37 DMX Party Up
38 Counting Crows Mrs. Potter's Lullaby
39 Sinéad O'Connor No Man's Woman
40 Coldplay Yellow
41 De La Soul featuring Redman Oooh
42 No Doubt Bathwater
43 Lucy Pearl Dance Tonight
44 Zebrahead Playmate Of The Year
45 Blink-182 Adam's Song
46 Travis Why Does It Always Rain On Me?
47 Fastball You're An Ocean
48 Wu-Tang Clan Gravel Pit
49 BT featuring M. Doughty Never Gonna Come Back Down
50 Radiohead Optimistic
51 The Deftones Change (In The House Of Flies)
52 Lit Miserable
53 Nine Inch Nails Into The Void
54 A Perfect Circle Judith
55 Goldfinger Counting The Days
56 BBMak Back Here
57 The Wiseguys Start The Commotion
58 Everlast Black Jesus
59 Mýa Case Of The Ex
60 Limp Bizkit Break Stuff
61 Our Lady Peace Is Anybody Home?
62 Christina Aguilera Come On Over Baby (All I Want Is You)
63 Incubus Stellar
64 Fuel Hemorrhage (In My Hands)
65 Blink-182 Man Overboard
66 Ice Cube
featuring Dr. Dre and MC Ren
67 Travis Turn
68 DMX What's My Name?
69 Third Eye Blind Deep Inside Of You
60 MxPx Responsibility
71 The Ataris San Dimas High School Football Rules
72 Queens Of The Stone Age The Lost Art Of Keeping A Secret
73 Moby Natural Blues
74 Treble Charger American Psycho
75 No Doubt Ex-Girlfriend
76 Apollo Four Forty Stop The Rock
77 KoRn Somebody Someone
78 OPM Heaven Is A Halfpipe
79 The Offspring Want You Bad
80 Third Eye Blind Ten Days Late
81 Linkin Park One Step Closer
82 Destiny's Child Independent Woman (Part I)
83 Everclear Wonderful
84 Bowling For Soup The Bitch Song
85 Rage Against The Machine Sleep Now In The Fire
86 Our Lady Peace Thief
87 The Dandy Warhols Bohemian Like You
88 Oasis Where Did It All Go Wrong?
89 The Spooks Things I've Seen
90 At The Drive-In One Armed Scissor
91 Fenix TX All My Fault
92 Smashing Pumpkins Stand Inside Your Love
93 The Aquabats I Fell Asleep On My Arm
94 Goldfinger 19 Red Balloons
95 SR-71 Right Now
96 Detsl Vecherinka
97 The Offspring Totalimmortal
98 Fiona Apple Limp
99 Aaron Carter Aaron's Party (Come Get It)
100 Elton John Tiny Dancer

Yearbook Anonymous

And I thought I got away with a lot as "editor-in-chief" of my high school yearbook.

Akiba Hebrew Academy, California
Scandal: Seven graduating students were blamed for a malicious prank regarding their yearbook as a sign of their boredom with the school. A bogus yearbook showed an image of the male reproductive organ when folded in the middle.

Anacostia High School, Washington DC
Scandal: Yearbook staffers wanted to run a [senior award] category called "Gayest" – an award that would go to the most effeminate male senior.

Battle Mountain High School, Nevada
Scandal: A photographic feature on pregnant students, provoking criticism from a local teenage pregnancy prevention group that says it makes light of a serious issue. The two-page feature, jokingly titled "Don't Drink The Water," includes photos of seven such girls and passages on what it is like to be in school while pregnant. The yearbook's editor, Amie Oppelt, said the intent of the feature was to reflect student life at the high school.

Blandensburg High School, Washington DC
Scandal: Yearbook adviser Elias Vlanton had to rush to the printer to pull the "Cutest Couple" photo because the girl in it suddenly realized she didn't want her mother to know she was dating anyone.

Bronxville High School, New York
Scandal: Photo of football players simulating a sexual act, with the caption "One Time, At Football Camp…"

Central Regional High School, New Jersey
Scandal: Two pages depicting the piercings and tattoos of students.

Greenwich High School, Connecticut
Scandal: Five white male seniors were suspended for allegedly slipping coded messages of racial hatred into their school yearbook captions. The yearbook message is spread across several pages. At the end of the caption beneath Keith Dianis' picture is the word "kill." Patrick Fox ends his with "ALL." Ed Oberbeck lists "ni." Robert Texiere uses "gg." And Aaron Valenti closes with "ERS." Read the captions in order and the vile message is clear: Kill ALL niggERS. No one noticed the offensive phrase until one of the seniors bragged to friends about getting it published. The boys, all athletes, called the incident a misunderstanding.

Fiorello H. La Guardia High School, New York
Scandal: An outcry from parents over a high school senior's use of a yearbook quotation from Hitler's memoir Mein Kampf. Nicole Scuderi chose the following: "The very first essential for success is a perpetually constant and regular employment of violence – Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf."

Porter-Gaud School, South Carolina
Scandal: A female senior's hobby was changed to something ribald.

Roane County High School, Tennessee
Scandal: Affectionate poses on the "PDA page"; photos of condoms and an unmade bed under the title "Sex Happens."


Christmas Presents That Don't Not Suck

Once again, the holiday season is upon us. This year, I urge you all to give generously. Give non-perishable goods, give toys, and – if you're short on cash – give head. Just don't give these things:
Backstreet Boys • Black And Blue
Devil music.
Robot Dogs
What good is a dog you can't eat?
Rubber Fish That Talk And Sing
The biggest waste of natural resources since Anna Nicole Smith.
Survivor: The Board Game
You actually vote people off the game board. The tribe has sold out.
PlayStation 2
You'd have to be a fucking retard to give this away.

Tweak of the Week

The hell is a Bat Mitzvah? Some 12-year-old girl envies her brother so now every kid gets a service and party? Give me a break. Why does everybody have to do everything? I mean, how far must we level the playing field until people are happy? Do you girls want to be circumcised too? Oh wait, that's a bad thing. So is not having a penis. Deal with it.