"But I didn't do anything!"
"Bologna on rye, Phil!"
"No! Truth meat on honesty bread!" (The Last Man on Earth, S01E10)
"I asked for a do-over and instead I got a doo doo-over. Boom, I still got it." (The Last Man on Earth, S01E10)
"Todd, I did not co-write 'Fields of Gold.' The only person who wrote that song was Sting." (The Last Man on Earth, S01E10)
The Winklevii? (Silicon Valley, S02E01)
"I don't want to live in a world where someone else makes the world a better place better than we do." (Silicon Valley, S02E01)
Ronnie Gardocki! (Silicon Valley, S02E01)
Reposado! (Silicon Valley, S02E01)
(Silicon Valley, S02E01)
"That's just the kind of guy that Peter was – warm, generous, and not disappointed in Snapchat." (Silicon Valley, S02E01)
"That wasn't a cock-thumb. That was a cock-cock!" (Veep, S04E01)
"Shit doesn't hit fuck." (Veep, S04E01)
"'FUTURE WHATEVER.'" (Veep, S04E01)
"If you call a white guy 'brother,' then he'll give you everything you want." (China, IL, S03E02)
"The spirit of Jesus is a man who never touched a booby." (China, IL, S03E02)
50 shades of Gotham (Gotham, S01E19)
Norma shooting her phone (Bates Motel, S03E06)
Norman in a dress (Bates Motel, S03E06)
"We're talking about freedom of speech. It's the amendment so important, it's literally the first one they remembered to add."
"For white people."
"We prefer to be called people without colour or vaginas." (Community, S06E06)
"Let's see you type more descriptions of my 'Houseguest-era Sinbad wardrobe.'" (Community, S06E06)
All-American Girl, heh (Fresh Off the Boat, S01E12)
Face Off Season Grade: D
"Sorry, fellas. Want to drink in here, you need a badge or a pair of tits."
"Art, [sigh] show him your tits." (Justified, S06E13)
Joe Torre holding back Will Sasso (The Comedians, S01E02)
"I'm just trying to fit in with all these legends and Will Sasso." (The Comedians, S01E02)
Pamela nixing the flashback (Louie, S05E02)
Bart Folding (Louie, S05E02)
Lucas Bros. Moving Co. Season Grade: B-
"My dad, when he moved from Rome to Seattle, he literally said, 'The fun part of my life is over.'"
"Did he happen to say that when you burst out of your mother's vagina as well?"
"Yes, but I didn't burst out. I was cut out."
"Straight through the old…"
"No, they went through her back. Very rare Italian C-section through the back."
"Oh, through her back. That's interesting. That's how you were conceived." (Comedy Bang! Bang!, S04E13)
In China to donate his kidney to his dying niece, former black-ops agent Deacon awakes the day before the operation to find he is the latest victim of organ theft. Stitched up and pissed-off, Deacon descends from his opulent hotel in search of his stolen kidney and carves a blood-soaked path through the darkest corners of the city. The clock is ticking for his niece and with each step he loses blood. [source]
Bill How did you come up with [The Last Man on Earth]?
Will: We had settled on this other show idea. It was about… Val Kilmer used to, he stayed with me for a while 'cause we became buddies through MacGruber. This is in real life. He was leaving this one place, and wanted to look for another place, so he just needed a place to stay for what I thought was a couple days, and he just couldn't find the right place, so it ended up being several months. So that was what we were gonna write the show about. It was gonna be a partly fact, partly fictional…
Will: While [Val Kilmer] was staying with me, I was watching The Amazing Race. I was really into that show at the time. He thought I was an idiot for watching it, and then I got him fascinated by it, so we, for a short period of time, were planning to try to get on The Amazing Race together.
Val Kilmer should show up in season two of The Last Man on Earth playing himself. Celebrity survivor.
You know how people bemoan that MTV isn't music television anymore, or that History Channel isn't about history anymore? I feel similarly about most of the themed resorts on the Las Vegas Strip. Management has made hot messes of original concepts and designs. I mean, what even is Treasure Island now?
Ye olde Buca di Beppo
Sandwiched between The Cosmopolitan and Bellagio, the Jockey Club is the house in Up.
Considering that The Harmon at CityCenter is STILL being demolished, the carcasses of the unfinished Fontainebleau and Echelon Place resorts may just sit on the north side of the Strip forever, like scenic albatrosses.
The Fashion Show Mall is re-developing again. Remember when a submarine protruded from its facade for that restaurant created by Steven Spielberg?
Submarine to flying saucer to…
Jackie Robinson the basketball player reportedly intends to build a 22,000-seat arena on the Strip beside the Sahara SLS, never mind that MGM is currently building a 20,000-seat arena behind New York-New York. Three arenas within three miles of each other on the same street?
What Vegas needs is a new stadium (cough, Fontainebleau/Echelon Place). Super Bowl on the Strip. WrestleMania. Final Four.
The seemingly endless stretch of Asian strip malls that is West Spring Mountain Road
The combination Panda Express and Chipotle beside Harrah's
The store in the Venetian mall that shows video in its windows of Michael Jackson shopping inside on a loop
The swanky stand-alone McDonald's outside dumpy Circus Circus
The house on the way from the airport to the Strip with a unipole billboard planted in its driveway
The hipster-y area neighbouring the east end of the Fremont Street Experience
The park created out of shipping containers in said hipster-y area
The shipping container treehouse in said park
» The $7.5 million, 22,000-pound, kinetic chandelier at Omnia nightclub